which one would u prefer?

Which one suit u? :p

p/s: So many things happened lately. i didn't have much time to blog. So, pardon me for not updating this blog as frequent as it used to be. anyway, enjoy...



Today as usual, we had lectures. not much different from any other day in a sense that I was half-asleep during the lectures as usual -.- but somehow, i was fresh all the way today when Prof Jocehn Phren together with his funny german-english accent (if u know what i mean) gave the lecture. Anyway, the lecture given by Dr. Eva Doherty today was a kinda making me thought about something. As usual she started her lecture with some again-short-video-session (as my rum8 predicted) in the beginning. Today, the short clip was taken from the movie, 28 days if I'm not mistaken.

The movie was about a girl who's trying to fight her addiction. Sandra Bullock was the main actress. ^-^ Thats not the case anyway.
Here how the crucial part goes. As i was half-awake during the lecture given by Dr. Doherty, i realized that i was about 5 to 10 slides behind while leaving some sleepy-person-scratch-notes on the paper, when she mention something about liking and wanting. The lecture today was about the "Emotional and Cognitive Aspects of Addiction". all of sudden, I was no longer sleepy. very weird actually. something suddenly struck me. its about the liking and wanting. she mention something like - "u can like something but not wanting it at the same time because liking and wanting came from different part of your brain"- or something to that effect.

dunno where it came from or how it came into my mind, suddenly i started to think about love . its weird enough coz early in the lecture (before i was half-asleep), i tried to put myself in a shoes of someone who's addicted to games :p.
If I'm not mistaken, its the limbic system that responsible for the survival of human races and its also responsible for the affection toward something. Insula according to Dr. Gary Duffin is the one responsible for the pain associated with emotion, so i reckon its the same thing that effect the emotion. The limbic system. (Correct me if i made a mistake here.)

As i started to put liking and wanting to their places for further evaluation, i came out with the stupid rationalization regarding why sometimes people like someone but not loving them (in a true sense of love) and not wanting to live with them. Probably what is happening (from my POV) is that both part which responsible for liking and wanting are not being cooperative or mb not activated on the same basis. So, as one is activated, the other one is not, thus making ones only either like or want something but not in a full affection to able him to own that something.

My justification here is that true love arises from these two feelings. Feelings? whatever u wanna call it. In the mean time, when thinking about long married couple, mb this is the thing that hold them together. I'm not saying that these were the only thing as we know so many more thing that keep them together such as kids etc. but, without these 2 feelings that gave birth to love, i wonder how can someone live with someone who's he only like but do not want them. at the same time, mb this is also the reason why some initially-happy-couples stranded in the middle of their journey and had to re-run the path again. Not enough activation of the neurotransmitter mb to brought them to the end. Marriage. :p

And as for me, i might had ran through the same path at some stage of my life but as i said, mb just by liking someone, it wasn't enough. to re-run it again, i need some cool down periode. so, lets like lots of people, but loves only few of them. as i always remind myself, keep the option open until u really meet someone whom u both like and want. :p

So, what i'm trying to say here is that liking someone is another thing and wanting to be with them is another thing. So, to all my friends (guys expecially) next time i say that i like someone, plz don't take my word wrongly okay!! Love will only flourish if both are present.

in short,
liking+wanting= love :p
agree? the choice is yours.


Sepi Malam

sepi malam
cukup mendamaikan
cukup menenangkan
cukup menerangkan
hati yang mencari petunjuk

sepi malam
memang mengasyikkan
memang menggembirakan
memang menyeronokkan
hati yang tersasar dari haluan

sepi malam
kadangkala diganggu
kadangkala terganggu
kadangkala menggangu
insan-insan yang mencari ketenangan

sepi malam
bisa mencuit kenangan
bisa menjamah perasaan
bisa menyuluh petunjuk
hamba-hamba bernama insan

sepi malam
barangkali ditemani bantal busuk
barangkali dilitupi selimut nipis
barangkali hanya sekadar baju lusuh
buat tidur si insan tadi

sepi malam
datangnya tidak diundang
datangnya tidak dirancang
datangnya mematuhi arahan
kehendak Pencipa Agung

sepi malam
rakannya dengkuran
rakannya gelak hiburan
rakannya segala macam
kerenah insan melata di bumi

sepi malam
peneman para angkasawan
peneman para bakal graduan
peneman para alim solihin
penunggu kehadirannya saban hari

sepi malam
buat pencari rezeki
buat pakar kajibintang
buat kupu-kupu malam
masa lena bukan pilihan

sepi malam
singgah sebentar tiada pilihan
singgah sebentar dalam 24 jam
singgah sebentar memberi kenikmatan
pilihan kebaikan buat mereka yang peka.


Safe Trip Home

Dido- Quiet Times from latest album "Safe Trip Home"

you ask me where i go tonight i go back to today last year,
when we knew how to make each other happy and there was hope of everything,
Its hard enough to feel the world as it is and hold on anything,
Without these quiet times you've brought round here.

Im Gonna have to run away, im sure that i belong some other place.
I've seen another side of all i've seen it keeps me wondering where my family is.
Its hard enough to see the world as it is, and hold on anything.
Without these quiet times coming round here.

Now i miss you, i want you,
But i can't have you, even when your here...

i suppose i have to take you with me broken mind
i'd rather leave you here.
To forget everything you've seen and known erase every idea.
And you walk up in the street and hold my hand and smile.
Well i won't be taken in, cos i know how it turns out,
And it takes me back to these quiet times coming round here.

Now i miss you, Now i want you
Your not coming back
And i need you
But i can't have you, Even when your here

Now i miss you, Now i want you
Your not coming back
And i need you
But i can't have you, Even when your here

value for money: 8/10
worth to grab one (like me who bought it this evening) or maybe just download the whole album.
cheers... ^^


Latest events

Assalamualaikum and good day to all,

This week, so many events happening. Among those were me joining the RCSI Fencing Club, we got back out normal internet speed (which i reckon not long until we get throttle again )and me becoming more active like i used to be. Playing all sort of sports available in front of me including badminton, volleyball, football, basketball n the latest one, fencing.
Gonna be the next Hang Tuah maybe. :p
Thanks to mr-nice and irish-customer-service guy for walk your talk. not like the Mr. I***** that i spoke few weeks ago. liar!


Again as usual also, we have very little class this week. In fact, there is no class at all tomorrow. kind of weird as it is Thursday. Anyway, we are now learning about the brain structure and we have 3 practical session every week. One neuroanatomy practical and 2 head and skull practical.

For me, the first one is the best of all as we are able to look at the REAL human brain! yes, the actual brain! FYI, its very sticky and spongy. Human brain also very delicate and complex. as my demonstrator said, the deep we go in, the more complex it will get. so far, we learned about the area on the cortex (surface) of the brain and identifying the origin of all the 12 cranial nerve and look at the formation of Circle of Willis which carefully designed by HIM to supply all part of the brain with nutrients. Subhanallah... This friday, i reckon we'll be looking deeper into the human brain and try to identify all those putamen, striatum, genu etc. [dont worry about these weird terms :) ]

Anyway, i can't wait for this December as i'm gonna have a special guest from Malaysia. Haven't met him for almost 4 years now. Hope everything is getting well and on schedule Ashraf. Don't forget to tell me ur time of arrival ya.... ah, the nurse on call thingy...tomorrow i'm gonna try to settle everything n hope that i can work during this winter holiday after the exam which is scheduled on early January. 8th Jan if i'm not mistaken. Please all, pray for our success as this semester is very though. sooooo many new terms to remember especially all those friendly named drugs. duh...

k, better get going. need to get some sleep for a long day tomorrow.... :D

p/s: Jom semua pergi ke perjumpaan dgn setiausaha menteri pengajian tinggi tu esok. 6pm at RCSI. O'Flannagan Lecture Hall.


bertambah kesedihan

contract with BT actually 12 months :(
the amount that need to be paid must be quite high to breach the contact.


Siapa cakap TMnet Malaysia teruk?

AGH!!! tgh tensen hangin satu badan harini. INternet lembap tahap cipan.
BTireland ni mmg hampes.Konon Unlimited download package, tp diorng cut the speed of our connection sbb konon2nya kitorng ni heavy user. For sure la! 7 org kongsi, awat yg x heavynya! N that's the reason we opted for the UNLIMITED package tu. Kalau x heavy user, watpa nk amik yg UNLIMITED, PANDAI!

they claimed that we were also need to comply to the so-called Fair Usage policy. benci btol!
len kali kalau xnak bg unlimited, cakap awal la! ni konon unlimited, pastu slowkn smpi download speed jadik <100 Kbps. Diulangi <100 KBPS!!! Mak aih, yg asalnya dlu 8000KBPS plus tu skrg dah jadik <100 KBPS. Apa kes sebenarnya ni?

luckily the contract is only only for 6 months n after this, kalau the same problem still happening, surely we gonna change the ISP. After having this problem, i realized that its not only me pun, actually BT company ni memang terkenal dgn policy men THROTTLE internet speed of their user. How can i not know this? urgh...geram2. siot pnya BTireland.

anyway, nasib baik la gak masih bleh buka webpage walaupun lembap kalahkan broadband internet connection di Malaysia. Hm...nilah yg dikatakan... Kusangkakan...hujan berpanjangan, tiba gerimis di tengah hari...

ALL dubliners, PLZ STOP USING BT!!! banned!